Boeing Passenger Claims Catastrophic Tray Table Failure Prevented Him Eating Dinner

Yet another incident has rocked the under-fire Boeing company. And just hours after Secretary of State Blinken’s Boeing 737 reported an oxygen failure.

The hinge of a tray table on a Boeing 787 failed and fell into the lap of a distraught passenger. There was nothing on the tray as the passenger in question, Peregrine Fellows, was waiting for his special order. A vegan meal, ordered preflight. But there was still considerable trauma as Mr. Fellows had to balance, unsuccessfully, the meal on his lap when it eventually arrived. All this, whilst inconveniencing the passenger next to him, who had to accommodate an extra glass of still mineral water on his own tray.

The flight crew managed to land the aircraft safely with no loss of life but the incident has been reported to the Federal Aviation Authority (FAA). Boeing have acknowledged their responsibility and promised to do ‘the right thing’. But this slightly vague statement may be a pre-emptive maneuver to dilute the impact of a personal lawsuit brought about by Mr. Fellows.  According to the cabin crew on the flight, Mr. Fellows was unmoved by the argument that was a sticker on the latch of the tray table which cautioned against being opened.  

But Wait, There’s More

Boeing were unavailable for further comment. But it’s suspected the company is still grappling with the PR fallout from another incident. This one involving the loss of electrical power to the personal video screen of seat 24J. This time, a Boeing 777. This was particularly unnerving because it was on a transatlantic flight at an altitude of 11,500 metres. This widely reported incident cast further doubt in Wall Street about the company’s future. The electrical failure couldn’t have occurred at a worse time. It happened just before it was revealed that James Bond had fathered a daughter in No Time To Die.

This particular Boeing 787 Dreamliner apparently had a history of screen failure in the same seat, at equally inopportune moments. But the appropriate engineering docket was never opened. An independent enquiry headed by Airbus is expected to recommend the immediate grounding of all Boeing 787s until further notice.

Editor’s Note: This is what happens when a subject just won’t stay out of the headlines. People like me start having the weirdest dreams.

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